EPISODE NUMBER: 8099 (May 8, 2012)
GUESTS: Michelle Alexander | Senator Claire McCaskill
SEGMENTS: Corporate Campaign Players & Super Secret “Spooky PACs”| Attack Ads from Secret Money – Claire McCaskill | Uncensored – Maurice Sendak Tribute | Sign Off – “I Am a Pole (And So Can You!)”
SUIT REPORT: Gray Suit | White Shirt | Navy tie with gray diamond pattern
VIDEOS: Tuesday, May 8, 2012
May 8th is a bittersweet day for the Colbert Nation: on the one hand, Stephen’s first children’s book I Am a Pole (And So Can You!) is released, but also Maurice Sendak, the man who in part inspired its very release, passes away. It is a fitting tribute that the book will carry on a little bit of his legacy, as well as his many famous works. It is also wonderful that Stephen had the honor of conducting his last interview, and in addition to the official 2 part version aired in January, we were also treated in this episode to a great deal originally not included in the series. Hopefully Maurice and his trusty dog Jennie are smiling down on us as we celebrate his life and works.
We also had a lot of time dedicated to all the current hub-bubbery (that’s a word, sure) about Super PACs in this early stage of the General election, and Senator Claire McCaskill did a great job in her interview at the the C-table. I certainly feel for her; it must be awful to have a slew of negative attack ads hurled at you, and not feel like you can retaliate or respond, because you don’t know who’s behind them. Not great in the era of an Obama administration purportedly dedicated to “transparency.”
Even though time was running short, we had another awesome, intelligent interview subject in Michelle Alexander. She did a great job of getting her point across: astonishingly, the U.S. incarceration rate has quintupled since the 1970s, according to Ms. Alexander, mostly due to minor drug violations (ya know, the pot and stuff.) Changes in our drug policy can save young people from lives scarred by the stigma of incarceration and felony conviction.
What did you think of the episode? Feel free to comment. And be sure to pick up your copy of I Am a Pole (And So Can You!)
Corporate Campaign Players & Super Secret “Spooky PACs”
(To audience) I gotta say, you guys are congealing like a fine pudding.
The general elections are underway, and I am as giddy as a schoolgirl who will soon be denied birth control.
To put 1100 in perspective, that the number of Arabian nights plus the number of problems Jay Z has.
Those crumbums in Washington are hearing our voice, our bitchy, bitchy voice, because so far this year 70% of presidential ads have been negative, and that’s not even counting the positive Gingrich ads, which are still kind of negative, because they contain Newt Gingrich.
But folks all this negativity can have a downside, for the donors.
Yes, secret billionaires are just trying to get “involved” in the political process, the same way the Secret Service wanted to get involved with those prostitutes.
…Newt Gingrich’s SuperPAC “Winning Our Future” which has now recently been renamed “Dodging Our Creditors.”
So now Edelson is going underground, where it is possibly he originated.
He’s talking about super secret 501 c 4s, or as they are now known, “Spooky Pacs,” which can accept unlimited money without ever disclosing their donors because they are technically “social welfare organizations.”
Colbert SuperPAC Shh!’s motto: “Making a better tomorrow at a later date that is none of your G-d damn business.”
And for you transparency fetishists, I am happy to now make my full, legally required disclosure: I have written the names of Colbert Super PAC Shh! donors on my taint in butterscotch topping. I invite the FEC to audit it with their tongues. [CN’s note: Very naughty thing to say, Stephen!]
“Their negative attack ads count as charity, in the same way yelling ‘Get a job, you dirty bum!’ is a donation to the homeless.”
“I believe that’s what our Founding Fathers envisioned for democracy. No, not those founders Jimmy, the anonymous ones in the back.”
” Last year (Crossroads GPS) received two anonymous 10 million dollar donations. They were so secret, it’s possible even Karl doesn’t know who they were from. He might have received them through his donation glory hole.
Attack Ads from Secret Money – Claire McCaskill
SC: All these good men want to do is run attack ads against you with money that is not traceable. Why do you have to make that ugly?
CM: Because secret usually is ugly. It’s kind of sleazy, slimy, secret money-
SC: (Obnoxiously interrupts) The money is not secret, the money is very public, the men are secret.
*****
SC: If people knew who was giving you that money, then the people donating this money, or women, might face the kind of attack ads you’re facing.
CM: (laughing) Wouldn’t that be unfair?
SC: But they’re private individuals, your a public figure. You deserve the attack ads.
CM: I certainly expect attack ads in commercials, but what I don’t expect is for this all to be secret.
****
SC: Why don’t you get your own Spooky PAC? Why not fire with fire, instead of fighting fire by going “Oh my God I’m on fire!”
CM: I really don’t want a Spooky PAC, I want the voters to be able to look at who’s giving me money and make up their mind. For these Spooky PACs, we don’t know, we have no idea.
****
SC: You know, I have a Super PAC….and I don’t know if you read the paper, I’ve got so much cash. Would you like some of it?
CM: Well, I can’t ask you for Super PAC money, because that would be coordination, which, as you well know, Stephen, is illegal.
SC: I was trying to entrap you in a federal crime.
CM: You were! I caught you!
SC: Good lady.
Uncensored – Maurice Sendak Tribute
Maurice Sendak: What is a children’s book? I don’t have a clue, I’m famous for them, I write them, I illustrate them, but I don’t know what they are, I don’t know why they are for children.
SC: I like that your work doesn’t sugarcoat childhood. You bring the pain, you keep it real.
MS: But some people think that it’s not appropriate for children, to suffer pain, read about it, think about it, feel about it, but yet that’s all they do.
SC: Every moment of childhood is a sense of uncertainty.
MS: Yes, I think childhood is a period of great torment, when you learn all these things, of what is, of what isn’t, of what you can do, what cannot do, it’s very hard.
SC: What’s the best thing a parent can do for a child?
MS: Love him/her.
SC: What’s that mean?
MS: Take them for what they are.
Interview
Michelle Alexander: Today we have a new system of racial and social control, uh, a system of mass incarceration, that operates in ways that are eerily reminiscent of a system we supposedly left behind.
SC: You’re going after my man, Ronald Reagan now.
***
SC: You’re saying white drug abusers are boring. Black people have to be cooler at that, too!
MA: I’m saying that people who use and sell drugs who have jobs, live in decent neighborhoods and all of that may not provide as much entertainment as people who are struggling for basic survival.
SC: …people tell me I’m white, and I believe them, because I get my drugs from a pharmacy. But aren’t we beyond any sort of racial discrimination in this country? We have an African-American president. (Slaps hands) Fixed.
****
MA: One of the biggest myths about mass incarceration who are sent to jails is that they become overwhelmingly violent offenders.
SC: They turn into Muslims….I’m just saying it’s simpler to just say “no.” Your answer doesn’t have the word “just” in it.
MA:It doesn’t have the word “just”, but it is just “be fair.” Treat people of color as human beings worthy of dignity, respect, and the same chances of life as people growing up in middle class, white neighborhoods, who make the same kinds of mistakes but aren’t asked to pay for the rest of their lives for their mistakes.”
SC: Good luck, good luck.
Sign Off – “I Am a Pole (And So Can You!)”
May 8, 2012 — Michelle Alexander
EPISODE NUMBER: 8099 (May 8, 2012)
GUESTS: Michelle Alexander | Senator Claire McCaskill
SEGMENTS: Corporate Campaign Players & Super Secret “Spooky PACs”| Attack Ads from Secret Money – Claire McCaskill | Uncensored – Maurice Sendak Tribute | Sign Off – “I Am a Pole (And So Can You!)”
SUIT REPORT: Gray Suit | White Shirt | Navy tie with gray diamond pattern
VIDEOS: Tuesday, May 8, 2012
May 8th is a bittersweet day for the Colbert Nation: on the one hand, Stephen’s first children’s book I Am a Pole (And So Can You!) is released, but also Maurice Sendak, the man who in part inspired its very release, passes away. It is a fitting tribute that the book will carry on a little bit of his legacy, as well as his many famous works. It is also wonderful that Stephen had the honor of conducting his last interview, and in addition to the official 2 part version aired in January, we were also treated in this episode to a great deal originally not included in the series. Hopefully Maurice and his trusty dog Jennie are smiling down on us as we celebrate his life and works.
We also had a lot of time dedicated to all the current hub-bubbery (that’s a word, sure) about Super PACs in this early stage of the General election, and Senator Claire McCaskill did a great job in her interview at the the C-table. I certainly feel for her; it must be awful to have a slew of negative attack ads hurled at you, and not feel like you can retaliate or respond, because you don’t know who’s behind them. Not great in the era of an Obama administration purportedly dedicated to “transparency.”
Even though time was running short, we had another awesome, intelligent interview subject in Michelle Alexander. She did a great job of getting her point across: astonishingly, the U.S. incarceration rate has quintupled since the 1970s, according to Ms. Alexander, mostly due to minor drug violations (ya know, the pot and stuff.) Changes in our drug policy can save young people from lives scarred by the stigma of incarceration and felony conviction.
What did you think of the episode? Feel free to comment. And be sure to pick up your copy of I Am a Pole (And So Can You!)
Corporate Campaign Players & Super Secret “Spooky PACs”
(To audience) I gotta say, you guys are congealing like a fine pudding.
The general elections are underway, and I am as giddy as a schoolgirl who will soon be denied birth control.
To put 1100 in perspective, that the number of Arabian nights plus the number of problems Jay Z has.
Those crumbums in Washington are hearing our voice, our bitchy, bitchy voice, because so far this year 70% of presidential ads have been negative, and that’s not even counting the positive Gingrich ads, which are still kind of negative, because they contain Newt Gingrich.
But folks all this negativity can have a downside, for the donors.
Yes, secret billionaires are just trying to get “involved” in the political process, the same way the Secret Service wanted to get involved with those prostitutes.
…Newt Gingrich’s SuperPAC “Winning Our Future” which has now recently been renamed “Dodging Our Creditors.”
So now Edelson is going underground, where it is possibly he originated.
He’s talking about super secret 501 c 4s, or as they are now known, “Spooky Pacs,” which can accept unlimited money without ever disclosing their donors because they are technically “social welfare organizations.”
Colbert SuperPAC Shh!’s motto: “Making a better tomorrow at a later date that is none of your G-d damn business.”
And for you transparency fetishists, I am happy to now make my full, legally required disclosure: I have written the names of Colbert Super PAC Shh! donors on my taint in butterscotch topping. I invite the FEC to audit it with their tongues. [CN’s note: Very naughty thing to say, Stephen!]
“Their negative attack ads count as charity, in the same way yelling ‘Get a job, you dirty bum!’ is a donation to the homeless.”
“I believe that’s what our Founding Fathers envisioned for democracy. No, not those founders Jimmy, the anonymous ones in the back.”
” Last year (Crossroads GPS) received two anonymous 10 million dollar donations. They were so secret, it’s possible even Karl doesn’t know who they were from. He might have received them through his donation glory hole.
Attack Ads from Secret Money – Claire McCaskill
SC: All these good men want to do is run attack ads against you with money that is not traceable. Why do you have to make that ugly?
CM: Because secret usually is ugly. It’s kind of sleazy, slimy, secret money-
SC: (Obnoxiously interrupts) The money is not secret, the money is very public, the men are secret.
*****
SC: If people knew who was giving you that money, then the people donating this money, or women, might face the kind of attack ads you’re facing.
CM: (laughing) Wouldn’t that be unfair?
SC: But they’re private individuals, your a public figure. You deserve the attack ads.
CM: I certainly expect attack ads in commercials, but what I don’t expect is for this all to be secret.
****
SC: Why don’t you get your own Spooky PAC? Why not fire with fire, instead of fighting fire by going “Oh my God I’m on fire!”
CM: I really don’t want a Spooky PAC, I want the voters to be able to look at who’s giving me money and make up their mind. For these Spooky PACs, we don’t know, we have no idea.
****
SC: You know, I have a Super PAC….and I don’t know if you read the paper, I’ve got so much cash. Would you like some of it?
CM: Well, I can’t ask you for Super PAC money, because that would be coordination, which, as you well know, Stephen, is illegal.
SC: I was trying to entrap you in a federal crime.
CM: You were! I caught you!
SC: Good lady.
Uncensored – Maurice Sendak Tribute
Interview
Michelle Alexander: Today we have a new system of racial and social control, uh, a system of mass incarceration, that operates in ways that are eerily reminiscent of a system we supposedly left behind.
SC: You’re going after my man, Ronald Reagan now.
***
SC: You’re saying white drug abusers are boring. Black people have to be cooler at that, too!
MA: I’m saying that people who use and sell drugs who have jobs, live in decent neighborhoods and all of that may not provide as much entertainment as people who are struggling for basic survival.
SC: …people tell me I’m white, and I believe them, because I get my drugs from a pharmacy. But aren’t we beyond any sort of racial discrimination in this country? We have an African-American president. (Slaps hands) Fixed.
****
MA: One of the biggest myths about mass incarceration who are sent to jails is that they become overwhelmingly violent offenders.
SC: They turn into Muslims….I’m just saying it’s simpler to just say “no.” Your answer doesn’t have the word “just” in it.
MA:It doesn’t have the word “just”, but it is just “be fair.” Treat people of color as human beings worthy of dignity, respect, and the same chances of life as people growing up in middle class, white neighborhoods, who make the same kinds of mistakes but aren’t asked to pay for the rest of their lives for their mistakes.”
SC: Good luck, good luck.
Sign Off – “I Am a Pole (And So Can You!)”