June 25, 2014 — Eleanor Holmes Norton

EPISODE NUMBER: 10124 (June 25, 2014)
GUESTS: Eleanor Holmes Norton | John Burnett
SEGMENTS: Obama’s Chipotle Blunder | Stephen Colbert’s Bats**t Serious – Child Immigrant Intrigue | Stephen Colbert’s Bats**t Serious – Child Immigrant Intrigue – John Burnett | Primary Victory for Thad Cochran | Eleanor Holmes Norton | Sign Off – Goodnight
SUIT REPORT: Black Stripped Suit | Pale Blue Shirt | Grey Patterned Tie
VIDEOS: Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Obama’s Chipotle Blunder

  • Obama’s biggest blunder yet came at a recent visit to a Washington Chipotle:

“Take a look at this picture. See anything wrong with that? […] He reached over the sneeze guard. That’s just not cool.”

  • It’s more than just not cool. This proves that Obama cares nothing about border security.
  • And just look at what Obama was pointing at. The mild Salsa. That sends a signal to our enemies around the world that our president is weak.
  • Ronald Wilson Reagan could chug an entire bottle of habanero and two hours later, he’d be whistling ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’ out of his flaming bunghole. Long may it wave!

Stephen Colbert’s Bats**t Serious – Child Immigrant Intrigue

  • I only bring this up because I believe in the American dream. When my great-great-grandfather braved the Atlantic crossing, he came here with the hope that his new country would never be ruined by a bunch of filthy immigrants.
  • And sadly, America is once again awash in unwashed masses. But this time they’re pouring across the long, skinny ocean to our south — the Rio Grande.

“The rumour is out across Central America about these so-called “permisos”, permission to stay in the United States. […] Somebody said they are giving permits for people to stay here. […] The rumour mill in the Central American countries is saying that once you get here, if you’re an unaccompanied minor, you can stay.”

  • More than 47,000 migrant kids have entered the country and been caught since October 1st. To put that in perspective, if you stacked 47,000 kids end-to-end, you could probably get a job in that holding facility.
  • Do you expect me to believe that not all Hispanics eat flour tortillas? Next you’ll tell me Mexicans don’t eat Waffle Taco’s.

“The rumour is out across Central America about these so-called “permisos”, permission to stay in the United States. […] Somebody said they are giving permits for people to stay here. […] The rumour mill in the Central American countries is saying that once you get here, if you’re an unaccompanied minor, you can stay.”

  • Parents are just dropping their kids off and then disappearing? Please, Texas is not the ball-pit at Ikea!
  • These kids say they’re coming here to escape poverty and violence. But my conservative colleagues and I know that the more likely explanation is the one we like more. Just follow Texas governor Rick Perry as he puts his head up his own rabbit hole.

“Rick Perry (R): We either have an incredibly inept administration or they’re in on this somehow. I hate to be conspiratorial, but how do you move that many people from Central America, across Mexico, and then into the United States without there being a fairly co-ordinated effort?”

  • I hate to be conspiratorial too, but think about it. Thousands of kids streaming up from Central America across our border. Obama. It makes perfect sense.
  • Need more proof? I’m out, but would you settle for Tucker Carlson?

“Tucker Carlson: Can we be honest and say that there are some people in office – I would say in the White House – who look at immigrants like this coming here illegally as potential voters. That this does change the electoral balance of the country and maybe they see this as a good thing.”

  • Yes! Obama’s organising bus trips from Tegucigalpa so these kids can grow up in America and become citizens through some future somehow passable immigration bill, all so they can vote and deliver Obama his fifth term in 2024.
  • So just to recap, the president is kidnapping thousands of Central American children, to take them to the U.S., to swell voter rolls and single handedly destroy our flour tortilla industry.

Primary Victory for Thad Cochran

  • Folks, I don’t know about you, but I am absolutely stone cold furious about yesterday’s heated Republican Senate primary in Mississippi, which pitted Tea Party challenger and short-haired Severus Snape Chris McDaniel against incumbent senator and man in reverse mortgage ad Thad Cochran. I say it is time for Cochran to go. He is a big government Washington insider, famous for channeling federal cash to his state.

A.J. Holloway: He got a tremendous amount of funding for Mississippi and the Mississippi Gulf Coast after Katrina.

George Will: No one brings home more bacon to his state than Thad Cochran.

Domenico Montanaro: He’s about bringing home the bacon.

Stuart Varney: … bringing home the bacon …

Andrea Mitchell: His calling card is that he brings home the pork.

  • He brings home the pork and the bacon! Though, to be fair, hog meat is Mississippi’s official state currency.
  • The point is, Thad Cochran is playing the dirty politics of promising people stuff, and then delivering it. But not Chris McDaniel. He’s so against federal spending, that he told a crowd at Ole Miss:

“I’m not going to do anything for you. … I’m going to get the government off your back, then I’m gonna let you do it for yourself.”

  • Thus standing by his old campaign slogan: “McDaniel 2014: You’ll get nothing and you’ll like it.”
  • Well folks, I’m sad to say the results are in and Cochran won 50.9% to 49.1%. Few things are ever that close in Mississippi, other than the genomes of married couples.

Stay tuned, more to come!!