The Complete Transcript of Stephen Colbert's TIME 100 Gala Speech.

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It would be fun to watch. I don’t want to brag, but I happen to be on the list for the second time. Anybody else? Show of hands? Anybody else, the second time? We are an elite club. One more and we get a free hoagie.

Secretary Clinton was on the list for the seventh time. She had to leave earlier. Still is an honor to have met her. She’s a feminist icon, a role model for so many women. Like the one young woman here tonight who bravely stepped into the media spotlight this year, and was immediately labeled a slut. I’m talking, of course, about Chelsea Handler.

Chelsea, you handled that with such poise. The horrible, horrible things that were said about you, tramp,gutter skank, and a lot of those were you talking about yourself. Brava, madam, you’re a feminist icon.

Full Transcript: TIME.com